I urinated on Uluru!

I urinated on Uluru!
By Max Earth
09/10/09.

Yep! I admit it, when I was a teenager, I went with a group of boys from Box Hill Tech College of eastern Melbourne to Central Australia.

A group of untamed rascals we were. Before we reached Uluru (in about 1971), our ex-suburban bus, with a much heavier-than-standard V-8 diesel motor fitted especially for the trip, broke a rear suspension spring, so forty or so of us were stuck in the desert for two or three days, waiting replacement parts. As I recall it was somewhere short of Curtin Springs, on the rough, corrugated dirt road between the Stuart highway and the Rock.

Back then, Oh how old we are!, the road turned to dirt only a few miles north of Port Augusta, so being tough little (suburban) Aussie kids as we were, we endured the thousands of miles of dirt track, in a suburban bus, to Ayers Rock, then Alice Springs and back.

Hoolee doolee!

That was my first trip to Uluru.

Time has made it all a bit of a dream now, at 54 years. But I do remember having a race to the top of Uluru with a classmate (well, we knew each other?) Peter Rash. I won of course! Yeah! Time does wonders for bad memories, even though Rashie was a much faster runner than I.

We all scampered around the top of the Rock for as long as we were allowed, and duly made our way back down.

Kids being excited kids, a weewee was unavoidable.

I don't actually remember off which edge of the rock I pissed, but I am sure I “went”.

What's more, some twenty years later, I found myself up there AGAIN.

I wuz an alcoholic by then, and had shared a few beers and bourbins with an ex-Hari Krishna bloke I met at the Stuart Highway turn-off camp ground the night before.

Even in my thirties, I knew nothing of Aborigine Culture, nor of the Significance to them of Uluru. So...., I “went”, after I'd climbed to the top, again.

Shame on ME!

Since then, I've traveled far, and along the way learnt, against all denials to this day by my half family, that I have Gunnai Aborigine blood coursing through my veins.
Since those bad and dark old days, I've turned into an Advocate for Aborigine Rights, let's say, and through my wireless broadband internet stick thing, trumpet the Virtues of Aborigine Culture whenever I can.

Not, that I really have any Right to do so, as I'm an Outlaw to everyone it seems, and have never been “Initiated” into any Aborigine Culture, Tribe or Mob.

But, all, this space-filler aside, I must now suggest to our soft federal and Northern Territory governments that weewee over the side or not, it really is the height of hypocrisy for Prime Minister Rudd to speak gallantly of apologizing to the Aborigine for everything whitey could possibly have done to them in February 2008, and yet proffer objections to the People of Mutujulu, at Uluru, to the idea of Respecting their Traditional Values and Sacred Sites and closing the TOURIST-DOLLAR-focused climb up Uluru.

Mr Kevin Rudd, Prime Minister of blond Australia, please Apologize Properly and Completely to this continent's True People, the First Australians Our Aborigine, by closing all tourist walks and traffic up any portion of the Magnificent Traditional, Spiritual Cultural and Sacred site of Uluru, henceforth.

To do nothing in that regard, purely because our over-sized overseas tourist industry threatens to be offended and thus threatens to reduce their rampaging across this Sacred Country, makes a disgusting, insulting and exposing mockery of the things you said to Our Aborigine in February 2008. Or was it 2007?

To ignore such requests, put with every possible element of Respect by The Traditional Owners of that Edifice, the Aborigine of Mutujulu, to successive governments, state and federal, is to display what many cynics and skeptics suggest underlies your bold front - none but a mouthpiece for the evil International Monetary Fund, the IMF, who prior to the 20th century, traded in blood and opium across the planet, ruthlessly destroying Cultures, Communities, Peoples and the Land, under the name the “British East India Company”.

Surely Mr Prime Minister, you are Intelligent enough to do all you can by making every effort to carry the Nation forward and far beyond those dark and demented days?

If, MISTa Rudd, you have any Wisdom, if MISTa Rudd, you have ANY Integrity, IF MISTa Rudd, you have any Honor, you will issue an Edict, effective IMMEDIATELY, that stops all but Traditional Peoples of Our Aborigine Nations, walking over the Sacred Site of Uluru.

And Kata Tjuta, for that matter.

Threats, at this stage, of Revenge, from the Spirits of my Ancestors, remain unspoken.

But it may be my Duty, to warn your insincere white mobs from Britain and Eurape, that if you cannot Honor even such a small Request, of closing all tourist walks on Uluru, you may have to pay in flood relief, right across the continent and islands of Australia.

But ALAS! Daring to speak out of turn, and possibly against the Will and Wisdom of Aborigine, I put it to all Australians, that the Most Powerful Spirits of Aborigine's slain Ancestors, live-on, and, more than possibly await, in Patience, the time to Issue the due price upon all who defile any part of this Sacred Planet.

Some may call the torrid events of typhoon, cyclone, hurricane and rain and quake, which these days wreak havoc across the globe, as mere events, mere tectonic shifts, mere seasonal and periodic changes in climate.

Some may suggest, from their insulated laboratories and observatories, with their hi-tech gizmos and pampered “field trips”, "el nino, la nina", et al?

While some, who have NOT lost their Connections to the Wisdom and Timelessness of the Ancient Cultures of Earth, may actually KNOW whence these upsets to modern, placid, unsustainable-thus-dishonorable lifestyles come?

Take Heed, white man, and woman, and child, and any who do no Good for the Great Mother of All Eartha's Children.

Digressing, in fact, not-in-the-least......

To Britain! Your regression to electing Mr David Cameron, cousin of your Queen of opulence, Elizabeth, sets you on course for many a shock, epicentred perhaps on the banks of the Thames River!

Where has gone your Souls, Aborigine Peoples of Britain, that you let foreign monarchs and their family misrule you and this whole Sacred Planet to utter destruction?

Quite so, your current “Labour” “guard” fails also!

But is this not a clear enough sign that “Westminster” and Whitehall” and “Buckingham Palace” and London's debting and usury banks have passed their use-by dates, passed their usefulness, and that YOU..., as much as the Peoples of Eurape and Peoples of the Americas, and of all other regions on this our Common Mother Eartha, must in these uncertain hours, days, years, Lift YOURSELVES out of the torpid stagnation of waiting for someone else to Make Right the Economic and Environmental situation?

YOU, People of Britain, are yourselves of Great Strength and Wisdom, and surely of enough Sensibility and Will to make Right the aged and decrepit structures rooted in those crumbling houses of Westminster, et al?

You know my Call is for Land Reform world wide.

But slowly may be safer for such an influential power as Britain, than too rushed a move away from the familiar?

YOU People of Britain, must Divine the Right path you must follow, and you must Divine and fearlessly Decide quick, for the Great Ancestors may be impatient these days, and may not give you too many more opportunities to Correct your path?

Do your Math! Do your Economic Science!

Think HARD, People of the Great Mutha Eartha!

Think very hard........

And henceforth, be content, when visiting Uluru, with photos from the several stations round-about Our Sacred Rock of Ages..... Uluru.

Yours,
Omaxa bin Eartha
Uluruba Outlaw.